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Posterous is testing me today. So now I test it!

THERE'S WITHIN MY HEART A MELODY {He Keeps Me Singing}

But for you who revere my name, the sun of righteousness

will rise with healing in its rays.

And you will go out and frolic like well-fed calves.

Malachi 4:2

Once in a while a song speaks to us, not everyone at the same time. I have alluded to this occasionally, I have many friends who do not like to sing "As the deer..." but equally I know there are people for whom this has touched/pierced/opened them up in a new way, God's way.

Being joyful, being exuberant in our praise representing the power of Christ who transforms, to sing when in the midnight hour of grief, or to sing when darkness pervades our every step, we need the indwelling Christ, only through him can we sing loud and clear, with full voice. It is easy to sing when our lives are going well, when our faith is not tested, but when we hit that pebble on the ground that is when we most need to sing. That is when we must draw close to him to shelter us from harm. This is a powerful witness to non Christians.

"There's more to it than singing" I was told once, when I was in a very, very dark place. But the Lord had given me a voice to sing and a pen to write lyrics. When I look back at those songs created in dire circumstances when even breathing in and out was hard, I see the Lord talking to me through the writing of the lyrics, soothing and comforting me.

Because of my own experiences I tend to go looking to see what the hymn writer was going through/ feeling/ where their faith was when a song pierces me. And then the odd time someone points me to a hymn, like this one, that is so full of joy and love and peace and wonderment that I have to go find out about the hymn writer and did they write more.

Luther Burgess Bridgers was born a long time ago and began a life of preaching at seventeen. He married Sarah Vetch before either of them was twenty and they had three sons. He was a busy preacher and often was away from home. Seven years after their marriage, in 1910, he dropped Sarah and the boys at her mom's house and trotted off to evangelise at a revival meeting in Kentucky. Phone calls were rare in those days but towards the end of the meeting he received a call to say there had been a fire and his wife and three children had burned to death.

His response, to wallow in grief, or to profess the faith he had talked. Well he was human, like us so was stunned and inactive for some time. But the Lord was not finished with him and continued His work in him. And he came to write this hymn in the same year of their deaths. 

There's a complicated arrangement of the hymn below, simpler tunes are available and some beautiful renditions on Youtube.

He_Keeps_Me_Singing.mp3 Listen on Posterous

Clarke's commentary on Malachi 4:2, "With healing in his wings - As the sun, by the rays of light and heat, revives, cheers, and fructifies the whole creation, giving, through God, light and life everywhere; so Jesus Christ, by the influences of his grace and Spirit, shall quicken, awaken, enlighten, warm, invigorate heal, purify, and refine every soul that believes in him, and, by his wings or rays, diffuse these blessings from one end of heaven to another; everywhere invigorating the seeds of righteousness, and withering and drying up the seeds of sin. The rays of this Sun are the truths of his Gospel, and the influences of his Spirit. And at present these are universally diffused"

THERE'S WITHIN MY HEART A MELODY {He Keeps Me Singing}

Jesus whispers sweet and low, 

“Fear not, I am with thee peace, be still,” 

In all of life’s ebb and flow. 

Jesus, Jesus, Jesus 

Sweetest name I know, 

Fills my ev’ry longing, 

Keeps me singing as I go.

 All my life was wrecked by sin and strife, 

Discord filled my heart with pain; 

Jesus swept across the broken strings, 

Stirr’d the slumb’ring chords again. 

Jesus, Jesus, Jesus 

Sweetest name I know, 

Fills my ev’ry longing, 

Keeps me singing as I go.

 Feasting on the riches of His grace, 

Resting ‘neath His shelt’ring wing, 

Always looking on His smiling face 

That is why I shout and sing. 

Jesus, Jesus, Jesus 

Sweetest name I know, 

Fills my ev’ry longing, 

Keeps me singing as I go.

Tho sometimes He leads thru waters deep, 

Trials fall across the way, 

Tho sometimes the path seems rough and steep, 

See His footprints all the way. 

Jesus, Jesus, Jesus 

Sweetest name I know, 

Fills my ev’ry longing, 

Keeps me singing as I go.

Soon He’s coming back to welcome me 

Far beyond the starry sky; 

I shall wing my flight to worlds unknown, 

I shall reign with Him on high. 

Jesus, Jesus, Jesus 

Sweetest name I know, 

Fills my ev’ry longing, 

Keeps me singing as I go.

Words and Music by Luther Burgess Bridgers

Zion{people}

“’I cannot do that. Jesus saved me. He did everything for me. I can’t be quiet!’” Lung Singh

This is a time of change, some that can be embraced willingly and some that need thought before embracing. Change usually means something good, it is a movement and we have to keep moving, there is no standing still with the Lord within.

There are times when we need to rest, but in that rest, we draw closer to Him we are moving towards the Lord. We can choose to turn away, when we know we are doing wrong and hope he is not looking. Of course he is looking, we are choosing to turn away.

I heard of a man that had a 'beef' with God, for ten years he would recount  to anyone who would listen his problems. They were not unsurmountable, they were problems that could be more easily be teased out than a ball of knotted yarn but this man held onto his problems, they were what defined him. One day someone close to him pierced through all the buff and pomp and helped the Lord bring the man to his knees. This hymn he sang with vigour and from then on witnessed and talked about the wonderful saving grace of the Lord.

Hymns are a reflection of how we worship the Lord, catchy tunes and arm waving, deep stodgy theologically sound dry verses. We all have our favourites. But should we? Shouldn't we sing out loud and brave no matter what. No matter what emotion is inside on any particular day. There are hymns that pierce straight through to the heart of the matter and when that happens it is beautiful to watch, to witness or to feel.

There are times when the last thing we want to do is sing and that is when we should. No one ever said we would be comfortable in our worship, it should prick us, the Spirit will convict us. I invite you to google this song and sing all ten verses and refrains. It is a joyous song of deliverance and harks back to Isaiah 30:19 in context - 

19 People of Zion, who live in Jerusalem, you will weep no more. How gracious he will be when you cry for help! As soon as he hears, he will answer you. 20 Although the Lord gives you the bread of adversity and the water of affliction, your teachers will be hidden no more; with your own eyes you will see them. 21 Whether you turn to the right or to the left, your ears will hear a voice behind you, saying, “This is the way; walk in it.” 22 Then you will desecrate your idols overlaid with silver and your images covered with gold; you will throw them away like a menstrual cloth and say to them, “Away with you!” Isaiah 30:19-22

Come, we that love the Lord,
And let our joys be known;
Join in a song with sweet accord,
Join in a song with sweet accord
And thus surround the throne,
And thus surround the throne.

Refrain

We’re marching to Zion,
Beautiful, beautiful Zion;
We’re marching upward to Zion,
The beautiful city of God.

The sorrows of the mind
Be banished from the place;
Religion never was designed
Religion never was designed,
To make our pleasures less,
To make our pleasures less.

Refrain

Let those refuse to sing,
Who never knew our God;
But favorites of the heavenly King,
But favorites of the heavenly King
May speak their joys abroad,
May speak their joys abroad.

Refrain

The God that rules on high,
And thunders when He please,
Who rides upon the stormy sky,
Who rides upon the stormy sky,
And manages the seas,
And manages the seas.

Refrain

This awful God is ours,
Our Father and our Love;
He will send down his heav’nly powers,
He will send down his heav’nly powers,
To carry us above,
To carry us above.

Refrain

There we shall see His face,
And never, never sin!
There, from the rivers of His grace,
There, from the rivers of His grace,
Drink endless pleasures in,
Drink endless pleasures in.

Refrain

Yea, and before we rise,
To that immortal state,
The thoughts of such amazing bliss,
The thoughts of such amazing bliss,
Should constant joys create,
Should constant joys create.

Refrain

The men of grace have found,
Glory begun below.
Celestial fruits on earthly ground
Celestial fruits on earthly ground
From faith and hope may grow,
From faith and hope may grow.

Refrain

The hill of Zion yields
A thousand sacred sweets
Before we reach the heav’nly fields,
Before we reach the heav’nly fields,
Or walk the golden streets,
Or walk the golden streets.

Refrain

Then let our songs abound,
And every tear be dry;
We’re marching through Immanuel’s ground,
We’re marching through Immanuel’s ground,
To fairer worlds on high,
To fairer worlds on high.

Refrain

feathered{refuge}

He will cover you with His feathers

 

and under His wings you will find refuge:

His faithfulness will be your shield and rampart.   Psalm 91:4

 

I began February in a very strange place, wonderful things were happening whilst being in this poverty that is likely now to last forever. I have to embrace this change and make adjustments accordingly. There is a wage coming in the house and so I am thankful for that. Then just as the month came into full swing I became aware of something not wonderful. I sit with both, the wonderful and not wonderful and contemplate them, pray about them and seek guidance.

The lyrics to a beautiful old hymn came to me (printed at the bottom) and gave great comfort. We don't sing the hymns I remember from school assemblies (they are gone now I suppose) and from the time when I went to church and from singing them at the piano in Blue's house.

The guy that wrote it, William Orcutt Cushing (what a great name!) was an American minister in the 1800's and prolific hymn writer. He has been described as noble, sweet and Spirit filled. Sweet is an odd word for a man but even in the writing of this I can think of two or three men who yes, I think of as sweet. 

He is further described as being poor in purse but rich in spirit and homeless but never friendless. Isn't that brilliant. From reading about the back story of the Wesleys I can see there parsimonious frugality as a reaction to having a father forver in debt. But because of their example others followed on this path of not searching for riches in the pursuit of God.

To take an example from William Cushing, he wrote a hymn called the Jewel Song. On a trip over the Atlantic Ocean on a steamship it was sung at a service and delighted the congregation that it was sung constantly over the voyage. Those immigrants then sang it in the places they settled and the hymn became widely known. How different to today, where hymns are churned out, sometimes only rewriting an older hymn or adding a chorus to an old standard and then it is played to mass appeal. Instead of hooking into catchy tunes that are easy for congregations to sing we should be testing them, be the salt.

What is around you? I like the lyrics of this hymn that speaks of being tucked under the wing of the Lord whilst evil remains apart. A fledgling bird nestles under the wing of their parent for protection from weather, from attack and because:

It is secure and safe place to be

Isn't it great that we are in that place when we turn our eyes to the Lord, leaving the past behind and the future in his care. We live in the moment with no blame or judgement, each day belongs to the Lord and we delight in his presence. We jump for joy in praise and we have quiet moments with the Lord in communication, in communion with him.

 

It is a place to remain in 

Amazingly the same person affirmed both the wonderful and not wonderful, I was not returning to madness, it was reall, both of them, so now I sit again with that affirmation and contemplate, pray and ask for guidance

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Under His wings I am safely abiding,
Though the night deepens and tempests are wild,
Still I can trust Him; I know He will keep me,
He has redeemed me, and I am His child.

Refrain

Under His wings, under His wings,
Who from His love can sever?
Under His wings my soul shall abide,
Safely abide forever.

Under His wings, what a refuge in sorrow!
How the heart yearningly turns to His rest!
Often when earth has no balm for my healing,
There I find comfort, and there I am blessed.

Refrain

Under His wings, oh, what precious enjoyment!
There will I hide till life’s trials are o’er;
Sheltered, protected, no evil can harm me,
Resting in Jesus, I’m safe evermore.

Refrain

 

Other hymns by William Cushing that I am fond of are "He cometh" and the brilliant "We are watching"

Who do you write like?

 

I write like :

Daniel Defoe

Edgar Allan Poe

James Joyce

Charles Dickens

Stephen King

Gertrude Stein

Dan Brown

JD Salinger

and then Chuck Palahnuik and Margaret Mitchell depending on what I am writing, 

Daniel Defoe and James Joyce kept coming up and amazingly only two women, one of which I am horrified I write like.

That is the tension for me, keeping it real whilst offering hope in the stories. It is so new to me it is hard to convey without being twee.

 

 

no {ordinary} day

Ship groans in the sea as the storm rises, their nails cling to the wooden planks.. The whole ship strains to be let go of the torment of being tossed and turned at the whim of the waves and wind. It begs release in its moans, not wanting to stay together, but the skill of the shipwright ensures that the ship manages to survive this storm.

Morning breaks into a day of calm, the ripples on the ocean a mere wisp of the night's memory. The air is so still there is no fragment left of the wind's temper. Sun rises high in the sky and the deck and masts dry out. There is no sailing to be done today. 

Down in the bowels of the ship amongst the faeces and vomit lie people, treated like animals, destined for an unknown life of torture and pain. Their dead brought up the bucolic stairs and thrown into the quiescent water. Released from the strain of their earthly life during their storm of anguish.

This is no ordinary day though and at the end of a bloody battle between this ship's company and another, the people are set free. They huddle together unsure of what to do. No master to whip them, no sailors to spit on them. They are free but it confuses them, for so long they have been enslaved that freedom does not taste as sweet as they imagined.

Ship creaked as the wind picked up a little, one of the people pushed themselves forward and took control. Mwilenko ordered people to different stations on the ship and through determination to stay alive got the ship moving. The charts in the captain's quarters meant nothing to her so she waited till dark, till the stars shone brightly in a cloudless sky and worked out how to get, not home for that place was tainted by the blood of her people but to a new land she'd heard the sailors in the port talk of. A free land, where everyone was equal and there was no more slavery, it was in the east, Custos Messium a constellation from years gone by would guide them to the free land of Tsidkenu-Rohi.

An Inspector Called...

An inspector called to my home he other day, it reminded me as things often do of the JB Priestly play. Eva commits suicide by drinking strong disinfectant. When I was a young girl, a firend of mine's mother drank a bottle of Domestos and did not live to tell the tale.

I have used bleach for many things, some prescribed and some proscribed but it seems to me a horrible, hopeless way to die. What depths did xxxx xxx plunge to see bleach as her escape from the pain in this world. 

Within our bodies, down at sub atomic particle level we sing,  when we can sing out loud to the tune of these particles, praise rises, praise surrounds us, moment by moment.

How many times does someone almost ... stopped by an invisible pull. The interconnectedness of llife causing a pause.

To be in tune with the moment, be in the right key.

We are all culpable in decisions of others, both good and bad. How we speak to a call centre rep might affect how they respond in a traffic incident that might ....

Each human being is uniquely created and we should work toward respecting the uniqueness.

I am so a square peg today in row full of circular holes, only the tension creates the harmony of the different threads.

My friend has visions, she has coal black eyes and an inquiring mind, she sees things that sometimes cannot be explained, my new-age friend puts her hope in the latest fad and yet another believes we are all gods. 

Random notions based on Toffee and her recurrent purring. No answers, more questions, more comment, more inspection of the moment...